Backlog Posts // I Need/Love You

Now I've saved the best of these backlog posts for last...
During my 'somewhere between denial and admittance' stage I met this girl. She was truly heaven sent. I really, really needed someone to talk to at the time, I was very lonely. And she popped me a message one day on Pinterest saying that she liked my pins. We talked and talked and our discussion got deeper and deeper. She helped me in so many ways. I needed someone exactly like her to spill myself out to. In a short time I developed feelings for her, these feelings weren't reciprocated which was completely okay, I'm sorta glad they weren't. Our relationship would be a totally different one if the feelings were returned and I think our friendship is magical just the way it is. I think my feelings just stemmed from the fact that I needed her. She was like a superhero for me at a time when I really needed one. It's easy to have feelings for people you need.

Stella

Backlog Posts // With People

After admitting to myself that I wasn't straight, I was able to figure out exactly who I was. I now know that I'm bisexual. Here's my explanation for you, not that one is needed, I just want to help you see what I feel. "I don't fall in love with men or women. I fall in love with people". I don't know who said that quote but I heard it somewhere and as soon as I did I realized that I felt the same.

Stella

Backlog Posts // Where I Am Now

There are a gazillion stages people go through when figuring out their sexuality. I went through a gazillion but I can sum them up in these few steps. 

Denial: I shunned the idea that I was gay for a long time. I hated the very thought of it.

Somewhere between denial and admittance: I didn't know I was in this stage will I was no longer in it.

Admittance: After a long time of fighting my feelings I was able to admit to myself that I was gay. This stage was both liberating and bounding. I was free within myself, but I was still chained on the outside. There was absolutely no way I was going to come out to anyone.

And that's where I am now.

Stella